Another thing that's changed from when your mom used to color her grays away under the cover of darkness is the quality of the products available. It's been a long time since anyone has gotten even a whiff of any strong, offensive smelling products in salons. Those have long since disappeared or been replaced by gentler formulations that are free, or mostly free from ammonia, peroxide or other harsher chemicals.
The second stop on the internet is an Expert's page....most likely to be on lifestyle web sites which tell the ground rules of which skin types goes with which hair color etc. Don't bother to read too many of these as each one of them is likely to have their own version of hair color palette! Once you have short_listed a range of hair color options, try looking for pictures of people with similar coloring and how they would look in it. Many salons have sophisticated software which helps conjure up an image of you with the hair color and it might be worth the money you spend on it.